i think i lost me

well well well, wasnt today a fiasco? my mum didnt wake me up, then my alarm didnt go off... guess who woke up to "WHERE ARE YOU?!?! YOU BETTER BE HERE!!". and after waking up to screams at 11:30, guess who skipped breakfast and lunch? then i managed to miss the two better classes. and i havent written at all today, but i do have a new 'laptop curfew' as if that will change anything at all. i have half an hour, not enough time to write anything substantial, and im also having second thoughts on the story im writing. but i did have another idea... two people in some situation where they couldnt talk to each other, or anyone, but they could see each other and sort of communicate. and i bet you'll never guess where i got the idea. fish. my sister has two fish in different bowls, and i was thinking to myself, what are they like? do the interact at all? this is also where (im guessing) the author of 'cloudy with a chance of meatballs' got his idea. the original book, mind you. i mean, food falling from the sky? on a schedule? providing all food sources? it just screams fish food. what does juxtapose mean? ttfn, writing buddies. and dont steal my idea, i really like this one.

this can be done

i just read my last post. i was kinda pissed off, dont you think? but now im not. come to think of it, i cant really tell what mood im in. and im not curious about what mod im in. is that bad? so anyways, i started the actual writing of my novel-to-be, and its not bad. and i think i will use a nom de plume if i get published. my name is just kind of un-author-ish. i was thinking somthing along the lines of Mira Ann Dowe. on the book it would be written as Mira A. Dowe. Maybe, i dont know. the W is silent, so its pronounced like doe the deer. Mira will be an author extraordinare who loves her two jobs (writing and a psychologist) but hates publicity and is a bit of a hermit. she is a great skier, and she has a husband, 4 year old kid, and happy dog. mira is more or less who i want to be in 10 years, give or take. more like 15. yes, mira ann dowe and her thrilling books that are always on the top shelf because clever me chose a pen name with an early first initial. speaking of initials, hers are MAD. oh yeah, and she'll live in boston. or a big stone house in vermont.
now that i have described my dream girl, (do NOT steal that name. i did a lot of research on various sites claiming no one has that name, dont screw it up for me. and now... found a song i like. im not sure if it is making fun of teens everywhere or supporting them, but i like it. im thinking it depends on your mood, age and overall life. for example i found it after my last entry, and definately could relate. but now... the basice point of the song is to say that i have suffered and no one can compare to what im going through. maybe they knew it would be an aide to teens everywhere. and the song is... welcome to my life by simple plan. the music and lyrics flow really nicely, and the main singers voice isnt too shabby. ttfn, bloggies

i will triumph, i will conquer.

well, im in a bad mood. my b***h of a mother has yet again made dinner. why cant she just stay out of the kitchen? it seems to be that all my problems stem from her. im constantly hungry because she wont buy food/make anything edible. im bad at math because missy math teacher (mum) and my actual math teacher are to stuck up and idiotic to teach. i feel bad for my mum's students, as well. i have no clothes, because she wont get a washing machine that works. i cant breathe because i must avoid her by being shut up in my room all day long. i cant think because she is constantly pissing me off. i cant be nice to my sister because her house scares me. i cant escape, because i cant figure out the exact turns to get to my house from hers, and im scared of riding my bike on the highway. (this is her fault). i cant stay at my house all week long, because she had to go and get custody of me and my sister. i hate her so horribly much. she is vile and cruel and sickening and i cant find the right words to describe the bitch that makes my life hell.
yet through this, i will survive and thrive. i told you what my story is about, and i will shine my hate through in the form of misa's hate for jared even though she must do some of the things he says because she is currently dependent on him. but not for long, because she has a plan. im not sure how i can channel my emotions into her forgiving him, though. maybe my feelings about e? the friend who you love but cant trust? nah, because she likes jared in a different way. but i do love e, so so much. she helps me get through the wrath of mum. and she supports me silently in every endeavor. thanks, e, for everything you have ever done. you cant imagine how much i depend on you, and those thursdays when i can see you yet again. i love you like harry loves ron, like fred loves george, like max loves lisel, like misa loves chise. i want to talk to you so badly, i need a hug. i need to know you love me too.